Two people smiling for a selfie with a background of waterfalls and a rainbow.

Experiences Make Us Happier

Posted on: October 2, 2015by Dr Kim Dr Hil

Buy Experiences and Feel Happier

Life experience not material possessions lead to the greatest happiness. A walk in nature, vacation getaway or evening with friends far surpasses the happiness-high from a new purchase or increase in salary. A host of research proves that memories are priceless to our happiness. This is due to the fact that experiences bring about the greatest changes in our brain. While enjoying yourself on a bike ride or a weekend holiday you are storing all of those good feelings in the long-term savings account in your brain. These memories provide a wealth of positivity to draw upon in the day and weeks that follow.

Brazilian Happiness Adventure

Having recently returned from Brazil we can attest to the happiness generating value of experiences. On our eco-adventure we visited two wonders of the world (Iguazu Falls and the Cristo), took four inner-country flights, went rafting over waterfalls, rode horses through the jungle, fed wild monkeys, snorkeled down the amazon with alligators close enough to touch (who were mating by the way….thank goodness they were preoccupied!), hiked through lush jungle, saw rainbows, butterflies, toucans and giant macaws and the list goes on. It was a feast for the soul and transformational circuit overload for the brain.

Neuroscience of Happiness

The novelty of new environments, rich emotional intensity, awe of nature and bonding with our cherished friends were all part of the science backed reasons for the happiness boosting benefits we gained. Neuroscientists tell us for lasting happiness to occur, brain cells have to be bathed in the neurochemicals that only emotions produce. Thus without sustained emotional intensity any elevation in mood is short lived. It has also been shown that experiences are seen more on a standalone basis while we may tend to compare purchases we make and ruminate over whether we made the best choice or got the best deal. Material items bring about more analysis, second guessing and buyer’s remorse. Perhaps most importantly, memories from life experience last longer than the initial rush we get from acquiring something new.

Six Ways to Be Happier

Next time you find yourself thinking, I would be happier if only I had…., consider instead how you can invest in an experience or memory generating activity.

Take a walk in nature. Just 90-minutes of walking through a natural environment decreases worry and reduces neural activity in an area of the brain linked to risk for mental illness.
Go on a trip or plan a fun stay-cation.
Build memories with those you love.
Paint, draw, or create something with your hands.
Be a tourist for a day and explore new places in your community.
Stretch your comfort zone and do something daring like rock climbing, surfing, learn a new language, take that improv class or pick up an instrument.

Hilary Stokes Ph.D. and Kim Ward Ph.D. have been a team for 20 years, specializing in mind, body, spirit psychology. They are the authors of the bestselling books Th e Happy Map: Your roadmap to the habit of happiness and Manifesting Mindset: The 6-step formula for attracting your goals and dreams and founders of Authenticity Associates Coaching and Counseling. They are passionate about combining the best of holistic and traditional approaches to health and happiness.

Ryan T. Howell, Ph.D Beyond the Purchase https://www.beyondthepurchase.org/aboutus.php

Gregory Bratmana, J. Paul Hamiltorib, Kevin Hahnc, Gretchen, Dailyd, & James Grosse. Nature experience reduces rumination and subgenual prefrontal cortex activation.

Zhang, J.W., Howell, R.T., & Caprariello, P.A. (2012). Buying Life Experiences for the ‘‘Right’’ Reasons: A Validation of the Motivations for Experiential Buying Scale. DOI

About the Authors

Hilary Stokes Phd

HIlary Stokes, Ph.D., LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist in California with more than 25 years of clinical experience, specializing in trauma therapy, PTSD treatment, anxiety, depression, and nervous system healing. She holds Master's degrees in Clinical Social Work and Kinesiology and Sports Psychology and a Ph.D. in Transpersonal Psychology with a specialization in Tibetan Buddhist Psychology. Dr. Stokes is extensively trained and certified in brainspotting, EMDR, somatic therapy and other mind body approaches. Her integrative work bridges neuroscience, mindfulness, and holistic psychology to help clients process unresolved trauma, rewire stress patterns, and build emotional resilience.

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Dr. Stokes’ clinical approach is informed by advanced professional training and her own healing journey from complex trauma, which shaped her commitment to therapies that go beyond traditional talk therapy. She has worked in psychiatric hospitals, addiction and PTSD treatment centers, universities, integrative medical facilities, and private practice. As co-developer of the psychology and wellness programming at Sanoviv Medical Institute, she witnessed firsthand the power of integrating mind and body for lasting transformation. Today she helps individuals heal trauma, strengthen emotional regulation and reclaim purpose through brainspotting, EMDR, somatic therapy and mindfulness interventions.

Kim Ward Phd

Kim Ward, Ph.D. holds both a masters and a doctorate in Transpersonal Psychology with a specialization in Tibetan Buddhist Psychology. She brings more than 25 years of experience in trauma recovery, Brainspotting and mind-body transformation. She is extensively trained and certified in Brainspotting, somatic therapy, and trauma-informed approaches. Dr. Ward integrates neuroscience, nervous system regulation and consciousness-based psychology to help individuals process unresolved trauma, shift limiting beliefs, and access greater emotional resilience. Her work focuses on healing at the root, beyond symptom management, through brain-body therapies that create lasting change.

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As co-developer of the psychology and wellness programs at Sanoviv Medical Institute, Dr. Ward brings a uniquely holistic perspective to trauma therapy and personal growth. Her path from corporate leadership into psychology shaped her commitment to helping clients move beyond external success toward embodied fulfillment and emotional freedom. Dr. Ward's expertise combines Brainspotting, emotional intelligence, contemplative psychology and purpose-driven coaching. Drawing from both advanced academic training and lived experience navigating complex family mental health dynamics, she supports clients in transforming stress patterns, reclaiming vitality, and aligning with authentic purpose.