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Learn a powerful exercise to get present and become more emotionally authentic

Posted on: February 14, 2010by Dr Kim Dr Hil

Emotional Presence for Emotional Authenticity.

Emotional Authenticity

The first step in emotional authenticity is emotional presence because the present moment is the only place you have real power to shift your state. Much stress and emotional upset is caused by lamenting over the past and worrying about the future. Often what occurs when people slow down and become present is they begin to notice how they really feel. Perhaps this is one reason there is so much busyness in the world today. People seem to always have something to do or somewhere to be. They are constantly talking about feeling behind with too many things to accomplish in a day and no time for relaxation.

Power of the present moment

As you get present and allow yourself to actually feel, you release the resistance and feel the relief and power of the present moment. It is as if you release the beach ball (your emotions) you were holding underwater for the past several weeks or years and allow your body, mind and spirit to relax.

Practice this simple Presence Exercise several times throughout the day to bring your attention to the power of the present moment and allow emotional authenticity.

Presence Exercise

Look - notice what your environment looks like, pay attention to subtle details.
Listen - notice the sounds in your environment, notice the sound of your breath.
Feel - notice your body, feel your breathing, become aware of any physical sensations.
Breathe - sink your awareness into your breath. Notice the sensations in your body as you breathe. Feel your in-breath and your out-breath. Your breath is always with you and thus serves as a perfect grounding resource. It is calming, soothing and connecting. Breathe so that you maximize your oxygen intake and relaxation potential by breathing deep into your abdomen on your inhale. Watch your abdomen rise and fall as you breathe.

After this simple presence exercise you may notice feeling more centered, calm and aware!

Coaching and Counseling

Hilary Stokes Ph.D. and Kim Ward Ph.D. have been a team for 20 years, specializing in mind, body, spirit psychology. They are the authors of the bestselling books The Happy Map: Your roadmap to the habit of happiness and Manifesting Mindset: The 6-step formula for attracting your goals and dreams and founders of Authenticity Associates Coaching and Counseling. They are passionate about combining the best of holistic and traditional approaches to health and happiness. If you are interested in learning the answers to the most frequently asked questions on how to decrease stress and increase happiness sign up for their free video series.

About the Authors

Hilary Stokes Phd

HIlary Stokes, Ph.D., LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist in California with more than 25 years of clinical experience, specializing in trauma therapy, PTSD treatment, anxiety, depression, and nervous system healing. She holds Master's degrees in Clinical Social Work and Kinesiology and Sports Psychology and a Ph.D. in Transpersonal Psychology with a specialization in Tibetan Buddhist Psychology. Dr. Stokes is extensively trained and certified in brainspotting, EMDR, somatic therapy and other mind body approaches. Her integrative work bridges neuroscience, mindfulness, and holistic psychology to help clients process unresolved trauma, rewire stress patterns, and build emotional resilience.

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Dr. Stokes’ clinical approach is informed by advanced professional training and her own healing journey from complex trauma, which shaped her commitment to therapies that go beyond traditional talk therapy. She has worked in psychiatric hospitals, addiction and PTSD treatment centers, universities, integrative medical facilities, and private practice. As co-developer of the psychology and wellness programming at Sanoviv Medical Institute, she witnessed firsthand the power of integrating mind and body for lasting transformation. Today she helps individuals heal trauma, strengthen emotional regulation and reclaim purpose through brainspotting, EMDR, somatic therapy and mindfulness interventions.

Kim Ward Phd

Kim Ward, Ph.D. holds both a masters and a doctorate in Transpersonal Psychology with a specialization in Tibetan Buddhist Psychology. She brings more than 25 years of experience in trauma recovery, Brainspotting and mind-body transformation. She is extensively trained and certified in Brainspotting, somatic therapy, and trauma-informed approaches. Dr. Ward integrates neuroscience, nervous system regulation and consciousness-based psychology to help individuals process unresolved trauma, shift limiting beliefs, and access greater emotional resilience. Her work focuses on healing at the root, beyond symptom management, through brain-body therapies that create lasting change.

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As co-developer of the psychology and wellness programs at Sanoviv Medical Institute, Dr. Ward brings a uniquely holistic perspective to trauma therapy and personal growth. Her path from corporate leadership into psychology shaped her commitment to helping clients move beyond external success toward embodied fulfillment and emotional freedom. Dr. Ward's expertise combines Brainspotting, emotional intelligence, contemplative psychology and purpose-driven coaching. Drawing from both advanced academic training and lived experience navigating complex family mental health dynamics, she supports clients in transforming stress patterns, reclaiming vitality, and aligning with authentic purpose.