About Us
Authenticity Associates has a reputation for bringing out the best in people. Authenticity Associates Coaching & Counseling Upon realizing their shared vision Dr. Hilary Stokes and Dr. Kim Ward founded Authenticity Associates, a counseling and coaching practice, bringing the synergistic power of mind, body and spirit to individuals and couples. They have worked as a team for over 15 years and believe strongly in the power of like-minded harmony. They are part of a pioneering effort combining the best of complementary and traditional approaches. Who We are Kimberly is passionate about supporting individuals on their journey of personal growth and transformation. She has a practical ...
Our Holistic Approach
Our mission is to empower people to achieve their authentic potential! What Does This Look Like? In order to achieve your full potential it’s vital to work with all of your resources - mind, body and spirit. This relationship is not often seen as important to personal and professional development. However, we believe it is essential to thriving on all levels of life. Specifically, we are talking about: Mind - Includes your clarity, emotional IQ, decisiveness, creativity and vision. Body - Includes your physical vitality, strength and stamina. Spirit - Includes the inspiration that propels people forward with passion and purpose. When one aspect of the trilogy is ...
Personal Growth Tools
Breathe Your Way to Health Guided Meditation CD Tap into your body’s natural ability to restore and replenish…and feel GREAT! Research shows that simple breathing exercises improve: Your Energy Level Your Mental and Emotional Outlook Your Immune and Cardiovascular Health Breathing is the most powerful tool you have for neutralizing stress and calming your body. CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE ABOUT Breathe Your Way to Health! Price: $7.97 Whole Body Relaxation Guided Meditation CD Tune into your body’s messages …and feel EMPOWERED! Whole Body Relaxation guides you to practice a powerful breathing exercise while relaxing each muscle group in your body. Listening to your body: Deepens Your Present Moment ...
Achieve Your Authentic Potential
Who determines your authentic potential? Is there a test you can take? Do you learn it in school or from a book? Do your parents give it to you? Ultimately, no one decides your authentic potential but you. There is no test to pass. It is not what you have experienced in life but rather who you are as a result of what you have experienced. Only you can determine your potential in any given moment based on your beliefs, attitudes, emotional resilience and physical vitality. You Must Determine Your Own Worth In the end, your opinion of you is the one that matters most. ...
How to Master Your Emotions
You can’t just THINK your way through your FEELings! Do you ever feel like you are riding an emotional roller coaster? Sometimes you are up…sometimes you are down. When things are going well the skies are blue, the sun is shining and you feel great but when things aren’t going your way, the storm of emotions blow in. We call this ‘conditional’ management of your emotions.' Anytime you place your power in the hands of external conditions and events to determine how you feel, you intensify your emotional roller coaster ride and increase stress. How skillfully do you deal with your emotions? I distract myself ...
Higher Purpose of Relationships
Relationship Mirror Relationships constantly challenge and call you to create, express and experience higher aspects of yourself. This ultimately allows you to step into grander and grander visions of yourself. Given this perspective, without relationships you cannot completely fulfill your purpose in life, express your authentic potential or contribute to the world around you. Relationships are a powerful tool for personal growth as they provide a constant mirror reflecting your light and shadow. There is no other place where your buttons are pushed and you are thus stretched to grow and move beyond who you think you are then through the mirror of ...
Focus on What You Want to Get What You Want!
How does your brain process language? What happens if I say don’t think about a problem? Your brain doesn’t know how to do this. You have to think of something in order not to think about it. Do you spend more of your time focused on what you want or what you don’t want? People often tell us what not to do, thinking they are helping us, yet in actuality they are telling us to send our brain in the direction we don’t wish to go. You do the same to yourself by telling yourself what you don’t want to think about. ...
Neuroscience of Emotion
Neural Hijacking In the past it was believed that information from your senses was analyzed by the thinking brain (cortex) first. Now with new scientific findings we know your perceptions, go directly to the emotional brain (amygdala) without passing through the thinking, decision-making brain first. Daniel Goleman in his research and book on emotional intelligence sheds great light on this subject. He describes chronic stress and the subsequent feelings of loss of control and hopelessness as a ‘neural hijacking’ in which the emotional brain triggers emotional reactions before the thinking brain has any chance to pick up a signal or evaluate it. For ...
Transform Your Habits By Conditioning Your Brain
The Cause of Habits Do you find yourself repeating patterns year after year making the same New Years resolutions? What causes the phenomena of ‘habits’ or why you do what you do? Quite simply, your habits are a result of the natural conditioning of your brain. The repetition of your thoughts, feelings and actions form and strengthen your brains neural networks. Your Neural Networks These neural networks are similar to a roadmap leading you to your destination. The more you travel down a particular path the easier it is to remember your way so much so that it becomes second nature. This is ...
The Real Purpose of Emotion
Emotions Transform Life Emotions give texture, color and meaning to life. Emotions transform life from an objective series of events into a living breathing experience. To experience the full range of emotions, to cry, laugh, or feel happy infuses our existence with meaning and value. Energy in Motion The word emotion is derived from the Greek word ‘emotere’ which is translated to mean ‘energy in motion.' In itself, emotional energy is neutral. It is simply the experience of energy moving throughout your body. Emotions serve however, as the carrier waves for the entire spectrum of feelings. It is the feeling sensation, the physiological reaction ...
Steps to Achieving Your Authentic Potential
Achieving Your Potential is a Present Moment Experience Achieving your authentic potential lives in the present not the past or the future. Deepak Chopra says it best, “The past is history, the future is a mystery, and this moment is a gift. That is why this moment is called 'the present'." Besides when we get to the future it will just be experienced as another moment of NOW. This is it! This is our shining moment and since you don’t know if it will be the last make it your best. Achieving your authentic potential is not a destination. It is an ...
Conscious Communication 101
Listen to Be Heard How can we communicate better? This is one of the most common questions we are asked in our work with couples. Our clients often believe if only they could say it differently then they would be heard. Our answer to this… Being heard is more reflective of your ability to listen than of your ability to speak. Some would say this is why we have two ears and one mouth. Practicing your listening skills may be easier said than done if you have not initially tended to your own inner dialogue. By listening skills we mean tending ...
Achieving Your Target Goals Practice
Become an Observer Imagine you are an observer sitting on your own shoulder eaves-dropping on your thoughts and feelings. Take a moment to consider what you want to be, do and have in your life. Actively contemplate your goals and dreams? Now make a list of your thoughts, feelings and beliefs related to your target goals in these areas. Do you believe it is possible or likely you will live the life of your dreams? Do you believe you deserve to be, do and have anything? What is the general flavor of your internal conversation? Specifically notice and write down how much ...
Emotional Presence for Emotional Authenticity
Emotional Authenticity The first step in emotional authenticity is emotional presence because the present moment is the only place you have real power to shift your state. Much stress and emotional upset is caused by lamenting over the past and worrying about the future. Often what occurs when people slow down and become present is they begin to notice how they really feel. Perhaps this is one reason there is so much busyness in the world today. People seem to always have something to do or somewhere to be. They are constantly talking about feeling behind with too many things to ...
What Is Your Purpose In Life?
The Journey of Life Each of us has an inherent purpose in life. Yet, research shows that less than 5 out of 100 people have even the slightest clue as to what that might be? Do you feel like you are fulfilling your purpose in life? Without a clear sense of purpose, we often become caught up in the form itself. We forget why we are doing something and our work becomes simply mechanical and uninspiring. More and more people today are asking the existential questions, What do I want to be when I grow up? Why am I here? What are ...
Meditation: A Powerful Relaxation Technique & Force For Change
Live in the Present Moment Technically speaking, there is nothing magical or mystical about meditation. Meditation is an increased concentration and awareness; a process to live in the present moment to produce and enjoy a tranquil state of mind. It is about paying attention, in the only time we have, the Now. Living in the present moment allows you to release regrets from the past and worries about the future. Meditation is the oldest recognized relaxation technique known. Mental, Emotional & Physical Stress As human beings we are visually oriented, whereby we take in over two-thirds of our sensory information through vision alone. The ...
Relationship Myths and Conscious Communication
Conscious Communication Conscious communication invites you to take responsibility for the fact that there is no objective reality. Everything you experience is filtered through the lens of your subjective perceptions. If you want to create conscious communication in your relationship you have to be willing to discern your interpretations from the facts (…there is what occurred and then there is your experience of what occurred). Unless you are skilled at bringing your full awareness to the present moment, your current experiences are connected to all of your past similar experiences. So really you are in relationship with all past relationships including ...
Relationship Fact: Love is a Conscious Choice
Love Drug Relationship FACT: Love is a conscious choice. In fact, love is a verb and it implies action. Being ‘attracted to’ someone is also a choice. Given that love alters your brain chemistry, we can understand how it may not feel as though love is a conscious choice. But trust us, if you want to create a thriving and passionate relationship with conscious communication, consider that love is a conscious choice you make in the present moment. Research shows that your brain chemistry is altered for up to 18 months after meeting someone that you develop strong feelings for. This love ...
Emotional Movement Technique
The Emotional Movement Technique is effective for relieving stress and increasing EQ. One of the benefits of this exercise is that it takes 2 minutes or less to complete. Think of an issue that you find stressful. Follow these steps and work with the biology and psychology of stress relief. Diaphragmatic Breathing Shift out of the neural hijacking of the emotional brain with diaphragmatic breathing. • Breathe so that when you inhale you feel your abdomen rise and when you exhale feel your abdomen gently contract. This is called diaphragmatic breathing. Allow this to be the rhythm of your breath. • Feel the complete ...
Success Myth
How is it that you believe others deserve success but you don’t? Where does deservability come from? You Deserve Success Believing you deserve success is a reflection of your self-worth which you develop very early in life. Self-worth issues are often tied to the success myth that there is not enough for everyone to have what they want. What's more, in order to get what little there is you have to work hard, be a good person and live up to an unrealistic ideal. Most people have bought into this success myth on some level. This drives competition, perfectionism and procrastination which ultimately leads ...
Sideline Power & Subjective Intention
Sideline Power There is no such thing as being a passive witness or innocent bystander in the realm of creation. Everything counts. Whether you are thinking, feeling, acting, imagining or noticing, you are creating. This explains why it is that people keep thinking about what they don’t want even when they’re highly motivated to create what they do want. If you’re in a situation you don’t want and you notice it, you’re thinking about it. This means you’re intending its persistent presence. For instance, let’s say you have a significant amount of debt and your goal is to create financial freedom. ...
Success Mindset
Observe Your Internal Dialogue People who thrive and prosper in all arenas of life have two very distinct mind patterns in their success mindset. First, they let the perceived mistakes, setbacks and misfortunes roll off their back. They have the ability to shake off fear, stress and worry and transform old habits so they can continue moving toward their major objectives at full speed. This mind pattern involves engaging the power of the present moment to observe the quality of your internal dialogue. Developing your success mindset is a process of transforming your internal dialogue to see the glass as half ...
Centering Meditation Practice
Centering Meditation: Three Options Select one of the following three options to focus your attention and quiet your mind during your centering meditation. 1. Diaphragmatic Breathing – Focus your awareness on your breathing. Become aware of your inhale and exhale. Notice the sensation of your breath. FEEL your breath coming and going, going and coming, through your nose. Diaphragmatic breathing becomes the vehicle to carry you towards peace. Diaphragmatic breathing involves inhaling allowing your stomach to rise and exhaling allowing your stomach to gently fall. 2. Sound – Choose to focus your attention on a sound. Let the sound of music, silence, or ...
Centering Meditation Introduction
Centering Meditation Purpose The purpose of the Centering Meditation is to help you quiet your mind and experience your center. In reality it will only point you to who you already are…an essence already centered, already at peace. It will also help you to recognize the natural state of a centered mind throughout the day allowing you to focus and feel vital. This is one of the most common types of meditation. You are developing your ability to quiet your mind, an essential resource for healing, transformation, and manifesting. Centering Meditation Guidelines 1) Posture - make sure your posture is comfortable. You may sit on ...
Leveraged Power of The 80/20 Rule
80-20 Rule The 80-20 Rule, is a long-standing mathematical formula demonstrating that a small amount of effort or energy output (20%) is responsible for a large percentage (80%) of the results. It can be both challenging and exciting to fathom this ratio in the context of your day to day activities. Is it truly possible to maximize your efforts this dramatically such that you can be 80% more productive? Working Smart vs. Working Hard Successful people understand this principle. They call this working smart vs. working hard. When you acquire the skills of working smart vs. working hardyou shift from doing to being. You ...
Power of The Present
Now is all there is You have heard it said before, NOW is all there is. When you truly understand this, it will transform your experience of how you use time to create results. There is no past or future happening now. You only have power in this present moment; the past and future are merely projections you are creating right now. Remembering the Past and Preparing for the Future Your ability to create your goals and dreams lives in the present moment. Most people spend most of their time remembering the past and preparing for the future. This lowers your vibration and ...
Know Your Change Saboteurs to Achieve Your Goals
Change Saboteurs Change requires hope, faith and determination. You have got to give it all you’ve got if you really want to make a difference in your personal and professional goals. There is a great saying that illuminates this further, ‘You can’t afford the luxury of a negative thought’. Maybe this is taking it a bit too far, but there is definite truth in the fact that chronic pessimism is a real downer to achieving your goals. Presence of Change Saboteurs We support our clients to take the following steps; 1. Eaves drop on the conversation you are having with yourself paying special attention ...
Achieve Your Goals with Positive Psychology
Changing for Good The field of Positive Psychology offers insight and hope into changing for good thereby enabling you to achieve your goals. In brief, Positive Psychology focuses on the solution more than the problem. It supports you to use what is working in your life to create more of what you want and less of what you don’t want. Here are a few essentials to get you started. Personal Strengths First and probably the most foundational ingredient to success is to learn your personal strengths. Your Personal Strengths include your values and your character. Positive Psychology outlines 24 personal strengths. Each of ...
Emotional Awareness
Master Your Emotions In a previous post titled, Emotional Presence we covered the first step to master your emotions; Presence. Emotional Awareness is your second step to master your emotions. Emotional awareness and emotional presence go hand in hand. The more present you are, the more aware you are of your moment-to-moment mental, emotional and physical state. This subtle awareness allows you to make quality decisions that are based on your emotional intelligence and creative reasoning. Emotional awareness reflects not only your ability to recognize and understand your emotions in the moment but also your ability to understand your patterns of responding emotionally ...
Transforming Challenges Into Opportunities
Victor Frankl: Lead With Your Heart Victor Frankl is known for losing his entire family during the holocaust and his remarkable journey of survival in the concentration camps. He invented Logo-Therapy from these experiences rooted in the power of your attitude to determine your experiences in life. “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing; the last of the human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way”. This is not unlike the heroic stories from Nelson Mandela, Desumd Tutu and countless others. An attitude rooted in love vs. fear ...
2 Neuroscience Breakthroughs Lead to Neural Plasticity
Are you hopeful about creating your goals, dreams and desires? If you answered yes than read on for neuroscience breakthroughs to achieving lasting success. How the Brain Works According to Nobel Prize-winner neuroscientist Eric Kandel advances in research are leading to a completely new understanding of how the brain works. In addition to the discovery that emotions play an executive role in decision making, the term neural plasticity resulted from the finding that the brain changes itself. There are two primary discoveries that have reversed previously held viewpoints on how the brain works. These breakthroughs are tremendously important to the future treatment ...
Neural Plasticity Creates Solutions
Change Your Brain Neural Plasticity is a revolutionary breakthrough with huge implications for people seeking better brain health and those looking to change stubborn patterns. Given that you have the capacity to change your brain, why do you keep doing the same thing over and over expecting different results? Why do you like most people make the same New Years resolutions year after year? The answer is simple, you are recycling the same neural pathways. Neural pathways are the biological result of your habits of thinking, feeling and acting. If you want to change your brain you have to train new ...
Neural Plasticity: 4 Steps to Change Your Brain
Neural Plasticity According to Michael Merzenich from the book The Brain that Changes Itself, practicing a new habit under the right conditions, can change hundreds of millions and possibly billions of the connections between the nerve cells in our neural pathways. The human brain is made up of an estimated 100 billion neurons making a total of 100 trillion neural connections. In our counseling practice we help clients utilize the top four conditions for supporting neural plasticity. 1. Positive Emotion PRACTICE: Do something everyday that you enjoy. While you are engaged in this good feeling activity, focus on the feelings of achieving your ...
Happiness Set Point
Glass Half Full or Glass Half Empty? Mainstream thought has traditionally believed that happiness is hardwired. Consequently, throughout one’s life whether gaining a job or losing one, getting married or divorced, there are those who will view these circumstances more optimistically while others will take a more glass half empty view. This is known as your happiness set point. This perspective may appear to work well for those who land in the glass half full category but what about the glass half empties? Can they change their happiness set point? Are they destined to always see the less than optimal side ...
Reach Your Authentic Potential: NeuroLinguistic Programming
Sensory Experience NeuroLinguistic Programming (NLP) is known as the study of human excellence. It asserts that we can’t know the world directly but rather we can only experience it through the representations we build from our sensory experience. This includes what we see, hear, feel/touch, taste and smell. Consequently, NLP strategies work directly with the way in which our sensory experiences produce the building blocks of our experiences. This results in our patterns of belief, emotion and action. In other words NLP explains why we do what we do and offers methods to change it. Transform Your Sensory Experience for Healthy Lifestyle ...
Quantum Mechanics & Your Authentic Potential
Everything is energy Everything is energy. When you look through the lens of a quantum microscope you see beyond the physical and into the world of the subatomic, the Zero Point Field. From molecules to atoms to subatomic particles, science demonstrates the causal field of life. What happens in here (Zero Point Field) leads to what happens out there. In the world of the subatomic everything is literally vibrating with life energy. From this viewpoint there really is no matter as we know it. There is only energy. In fact when broken down into finite components it is said that energy ...
Achieving Your Authentic Potential
Quantum Mechanics & Your Authentic Potential
Everything is energy Everything is energy. When you look through the lens of a quantum...
Reach Your Authentic Potential: NeuroLinguistic Programming
Sensory Experience NeuroLinguistic Programming (NLP) is known as the study of human...
Neural Plasticity: 4 Steps to Change Your Brain
Neural Plasticity According to Michael Merzenich from the book The Brain that Changes...
Read More Posts From Achieving Your Authentic Potential
Emotional Intelligence
Happiness Set Point
Glass Half Full or Glass Half Empty? Mainstream thought has traditionally believed...
Emotional Awareness
Master Your Emotions In a previous post titled, Emotional Presence we covered the...
Transforming Challenges Into Opportunities
Victor Frankl: Lead With Your Heart Victor Frankl is known for losing his entire...
Read More Posts From Emotional Intelligence
Mastering Your Mind
Reach Your Authentic Potential: NeuroLinguistic Programming
Sensory Experience NeuroLinguistic Programming (NLP) is known as the study of human excellence. It asserts that we can’t know the world directly but rather we can only experience it through the representations we build from our sensory experience. This includes what we see, hear, feel/touch, taste and smell. Consequently, NLP strategies work directly... [Read more of this review]
2 Neuroscience Breakthroughs Lead to Neural Plasticity
Are you hopeful about creating your goals, dreams and desires? If you answered yes than read on for neuroscience breakthroughs to achieving lasting success. How the Brain Works According to Nobel Prize-winner neuroscientist Eric Kandel advances in research are leading to a completely new understanding of how the brain works. In addition to the discovery... [Read more of this review]
Neural Plasticity Creates Solutions
Change Your Brain Neural Plasticity is a revolutionary breakthrough with huge implications for people seeking better brain health and those looking to change stubborn patterns. Given that you have the capacity to change your brain, why do you keep doing the same thing over and over expecting different results? Why do you like most people make the same... [Read more of this review]
Read More Posts From Mastering Your Mind